| | God, it's been a while.
So yes. It's official that I'm going to Florida, all that's left is dealing with the loans. I'm thankful APs are over. Senior spring is an interesting experience, as is seeing the homeroom empty (and clean) on many an occasion. It's hard to believe that after this week I may never be in a chorus again (I don't think there's one in Florida Tech, though it'd be awesome if someone could prove me wrong.) I went to Sakura Matsuri (the cherry blossom festival) at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens Sunday last week, and it was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen, and there were a lot of otaku, some in costume, all some of the nicest people in the world (I've found this to be the cast with most otaku, someday I'll be proved wrong and that'll just suck.)
*
I'm breaking up with Anthony today.
Yes, I'm initiating it. No, this wasn't an easy decision for me to make. It's because...it's because I shouldn't feel like I'm leaving something behind, someone who wants so bad to cling and who looks so far ahead that I can't take it. He always did look too far ahead, and that's sometimes really frightening. I know it's supposed to be flatterig, but still. If I did it later, it'd only hurt more, it'd only prolong the pain. I don't want to be the evil ex-girlfriend, I don't want to hurt him, but it looks like I have no choice. We all know how intense summer gets, "summers of love," and I don't know if I can handle that.
*
Something else is beginning.
Strange, since I'm breaking up with someone to have no ties back here. Yeah, I met him at Sakura Matsuri. His name's Darwin, he's a junior at one of the small public schools in the Bronx, an engineering/math/science sort of place, the kind of people who go to Florida Tech, strangely enough. At the time I thought he'd end up dating someone else, but she's not his type, or something. He's sweet, he's an otaku, he wants to teach me how to dance. I think I'm falling for him, but I don't know if I can handle it.
*
And life continues.
No matter what happens, I will still be in Florida in three months, a thousand miles away from here, away from this city, away from the memories, away from the promises, away from the cold, away from the cherry blossoms (they don't grow down there, it's too warm.) A very different anime club, a very different set of people, male classmates for the first time in six years, bigger computer labs, less humanities courses, lots of math. I'm looking forward to it, to new people and new places and the freedom to drive places and weekends sitting on the beach at Indiatlantic - but I don't know if I can handle leaving New York behind.
Oh life, what are you doing to me? |
| | Posted 5/9/2006 9:03 AM - 84 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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